Don’t you love how we find ways to justify our behavior to our children?
I did it today, doggone it.
I was a snot to the lady at Hancock Fabrics. And I wanted to be even snottier.
The kids and I ran a couple of errands. I made sure we ate before we left, but a large baggie of the kids’ favorite cereal was found in the car. It was like a glorious mecca of heavenly cereal that they both just could not live without…once they saw it. Since Indigo found it, I let him start chowing first.
Meanwhile, while I am on the phone having a serious conversation complete with prayer requests, they begin arguing about whose cereal it was…the word “MINE” got involved and it was not pretty.
It was getting semi-close to naptime, but we had just a short list of things to get at Hancock’s. However, since I am not a professional seamstress, a short list feels like I need a short bus to figure it out.
Sorry, I can’t seem to be politically correct today either.
My friend, Nadine, is teaching Greyley to sew. Greyley is all inspired. My little one likes projects, she does. And she is truly excellent at the things she tries. I can’t even believe some of the things she does~ she is extremely gifted. However…at times she gets going on a little too many things at once and…shall we say…they don’t always get completed.
On the way inside the store, Indigo starts fussing about wanting something from the store too. At this point, I am already ready to be home and done with the whole outing.
“You don’t need anything from this store. They aren’t even going to have anything you’ll like.”
These are words you should never say to a four-year-old.
So we get inside and Oh! the fabric! Oh! the buttons! Oh! the little tin puzzles!
Who knew there were puzzles at the fabric store?
I’m saying, “No,” right and left, while he goes from one thing to another.
Meanwhile, Greyley is getting inspired. Oh! I need material for the other pattern! I need a soft foamy thing for the cushion on my chair that I made that says 4 C from Mrs. Crumb’s class! I need cute material for the cushion! I brought my own money! I need…
I’m trying to find the things on the list. I ask about the lightweight fusible-something interfacing. And oh…where is the seam binding?
While I am asking the lady, she pauses to say, “Careful…”
I look behind me and Indigo is a giant, walking from the top of one suede stool to another.
Mortified, I snatch him off of the stools, careful not to drop the handful of things accumulating in my other arm…all the while, threatening his little life. Greyley picks that moment to come up with the even plusher seat foam that would just be perfect…
“We are getting out of here,” I snip.
Indigo is trailing behind, trying to let go of my hand…crying. Greyley is sadly returning the most perfect foam.
We find a little basket to carry our things in and we’re off to the seam binding at the front of the store…
Where IS it? It is NOT where the lady said. I look and I look and I try to find the lady. She is at the back and another lady at the front is studiously avoiding me. I track her down.
“Excuse me, is seam binding the same thing as bias tape?” I ask, showing my stupidity.
She stares at me coldly. “Uh. Yes,” she replies. I promise you she would have made that “Puh” sound with her mouth and shrugged her shoulders, with her eyebrow cocked, if she had been a teenager. However, ladies in their late 50’s/early 60’s don’t succumb to shrugging.
She disappears.
Indigo sees the very thing he has ALWAYS wanted…because you know this fabric store has EVERYTHING he has always wanted.
A package of Mentos.
I say, “No.”
He has not behaved in a way worthy of Mentos.
He cries.
I pry them out of his fingers as he begins to open it.
He cries harder.
I place the little basket full of stuff on the counter and pray that someone will please, PLEASE come check us out soon.
Lady Who Stares Coldly saunters up.
“This register is closed,” she says and makes a show of pulling the “Register Closed” sign out further, with a thud, so I can see it better. She walks a full yard~ I know because I just saw what a yard looks like~ to the other side of the counter, where the second register is…leaving me to pick up the basket, grab my son’s hand, and plead with my eyes to my daughter for help.
As LWSC (Lady Who Stares Coldly) rings up the items, she picks up an item and snaps, “This item is NOT returnable. You cannot open it and return it.” She Stares Coldly at me, seeing if I am digesting this piece of information. “So make sure you have what you want,” she says.
I want to pull her old lady permed hair, but I don’t. Or at least tell her she has added a good 20 years to her looks. But, what do I know? Maybe she’s nearing 80 and I’m the ignorant one.
She takes my credit card and says, “Are you a preferred customer?”
“No.”
She continues ringing up the material and not one minute after asking, asks again, “Are you a preferred customer?”
“Still NO.” I snap.
I hear Greyley kind of snicker.
LWSC pauses, but does not look at me and finishes the transaction.
I take the bag from her and would you believe the lady gives me the first smile of the whole visit and tells me to have a nice day.
I just want to bop her at that point.
As we get in the car, I tell the kids, “We are never going back to that store again. Ever.”
Then on the way home, I start feeling a little bit bad that my children had heard me snap at the lady…so I start backtracking…
“So normally, I wouldn’t talk to someone like that…you know…the whole, ‘Still NO,’ thing…”
Greyley looks at me…waiting.
“But she was so NOT helpful and if she’d just helped even just a little, I would have felt completely different, but she was not helpful at ALL…”
And on and on, I went…until I’d talked myself out of feeling guilty and wished I had been even meaner.
As I’m writing, I’m thinking of the whole…turn the other cheek…do unto others as you’d have them do unto you…all that. I want to say, “I’m sorry,” and not take it back…to own up to my mistakes…be willing to say, “I’m wrong…”
But I still wish I’d tripped her and seen her tight hair go flying forward and watched her glasses fall off her face and had her look up at me and say, “I am so sorry, I should have just let you go to that first register. You are so good and kind and I am so mean and rotten.”
Er, I mean…that was SO wrong of me.
Thank goodness, I can start over tomorrow and try to be better.
I am going to avoid Hancock Fabrics though.
I just think that would be best for everyone.